Doing It

This has been it lately! I'm doing it! I see that I often come back to blogging for a very certain reason. This one definitely feels the most healthy so far. I HAVE COME SO FAR.  I can't be embarrassed to come back to keeping track of things on the blog when I'd love to have the memories cherished. 

I love to look back, and see immense progress, when I retrace my steps through my blog. 

I started off needing to blog to save my memories for some future generation, but out of worry that what I was up to didn't matter to anyone now. I wasn't loved or noticed enough, and maybe at least they would care! 

I've gone through so many stages! Then blogging because I was so proud of myself, I needed to capture what I had done with my child. That feeling, right? I conquered a trip with a one year old!  

An unhealthy stage that I KNEW I was in and couldn't find a way out of during the pandemic. Could I connect with people? Why don't people notice me? Notice me! X is being noticed. 

And here I am on the other side. So much work that I've done. So much progress! Also, therapy, soo much self-investigation, feeling okay letting go of surface-level relationships, and so much time spent coming out of the box that my life events had put me in and I wasn't quite sure how to push out of. A lot of work. But I do feel like while I may not be fully on top of my children's items (coming soon), I am on top of finally re-seeing my true self--and this time being able to reach her--not from behind emotional and mental bars to where we could only touch hands for a moment.